YesSs~ I pAsS mY TP le... i'M THe OnLy gaL SomE moRe... WAhAHahH!!!
buT iT waSn't AnYthINg WortH tO ceLeBraTe aT All...
cOs soMehoW i SenSe thAt mY fRiEnD doN rEaLLy wiSh tAt i"ll pAss...
dEn... reAcH hoMe... fiRst tHinG fiRsT... QUARREL wiTh MuM & ciXi aBouT thE pUrchAsiNg oF mY biKe...
i'M MakEinG mY liFe So miSerAble aLL tHe tiMe... BeCoS oF thE bIke... i Felt wiTh nO moNeY aT aLL... haIz... MaYbE i sHouLd giVe uP puRchAsINg thE biKe... I caN leaD a muCh moRe NorMal liFe i ThiNk...
~~MonEy MoNey moNeY....iS noThinG bUt mISerY~~

My goAl Of gEttiNg My biKe.. iS coMplEteD...
mY dreAm oF owNinG a BikE... iS daSheD...
No moRe AiMs iN liFe...
iF i WeRe tO Die RiGHt nOW...
i cAn diE pEAcefuLLy... UntiL i Got A nEw reASoN foR mY mE tO stAy AliVe...

DoN aSk Me aNYthINg...
i doNNo AnYthiNg...
mY dEEpeSt SeCreTs hAs bEcoMe a sTorY foR u GuyS tO knOW hOw fOrtuNAte u ArE iN uR liFe...
i OnLi kNOw thAT i LeaD A waSted liFe... ALL THE TIME...!
No uSe feElinG JeAlouS Of hOw gOod thE otHer's liFe iS...
CoS it iS hOw suCky mY lIfe Is aLL ThE whiLe...

ToDAy wHilE lOOkiNG aT thE othEr's EatiNG diNNer anD i'M nOt...
mAybE i"m boRed... mAyBe i"m trYiNG to hiD mY eMo...
i tuRn CraZy... i foOl AroUnD... mAke mY fRienDs laUGh liKe mAd...
bUt whEn evErythiNg enDeD...
mY eMo sEEped In agAin...
thOUgh i MAke evEryoNE laUghEd... & tAt iS whaT i WaNteD tO...
bUt sOMehoW i Felt thAt evErythiNG thAt i diD juSt NoW...
iS puTTing thE lAbEl "waSteD" iN mY liFe...
i doNNo... i doNNo whY i Felt thAt wAy...


2 MorE daYS tO mY TP le... hAiz... doN haVe thE coNfiDenCe tO pAsS... =\

cluBBinG iS niCE!!! =P
siMplY enJoY It... haha
diDn'T gET tO drInk mUcH thouGh....
buT iT iS HigH!!! wOOt!

bUt tHen HoR...
ThE moMenT i EntERed ZouK... thEre iS loTs oF pEopLE maH... mY leG gaNNa steP lotS oF tiMe... pAinfUl siA... bUt i KeEp daNcinG unTil i wEnT tOilEt... deN i SAw mY toE iS blEEdinG!!! FUrTHeR mOre thE bLoOd hAs dRieD UP!!! [~OMG~]

ThIs FeW daYs... althOuGh haVinG suPEr buSy liFe... bUt mY heArt iS vEry eMptY...
BUT IS A TOTALLY WASTED LIFE... TaT iS How i FeEl riGHt nOW...
sEriOUSly tiRe Of mY liFe...

i LaUgh, i JoKe, i fOOl arOunD wiTh ppL SurRouNdiNG me...
OnLY mE FaCinG thE pAin alOne...
i Felt sO aiMlesS iN mY lIfe... cOS mY dreAm Of rIdiNg bIke Is sO neAr yEt sO fAr...
i Felt sO uSeleSs iN mY lifE... CoS nO mAtTer hOw haRd i woRk, mY bAnk acCOunT sTill $0.00
i FelT sO... W..O...R...T...H...L...E...S...S

FeeLinG sO emPtY iN mY heArT... i DoNNo whY...
lOOk At My LiFe...
i woRk In NiGht sAfAri...
i TeAcH tUTioN...
bUt whErE thE hEll iS thE mONeY thAt i'vE eARn?!?!?
i WoRk sO hArD bUt i GoT No sAViNg At All...
i TiRed mYSelF oUt...
i PusH mY bOdY oVeR thE liMiT aLL thE tiMe...
bUt whAt hAVe i GoT iN reTuRn!??!
NotHinG aT aLL...
siMplY hATe thE lIfe i"m haVinG nOW...!

TodAy iS mY lAst DaY woRKinG iN NIgHT SafARi BUt Ppl kEep aSkiNG mE tO stAY On...
bUt i ReAllY wiSh tO hAvE a BReAk...
iS LikE i fiNaLLy goT tiME foR mY oWn....
bUt i wiLL hAve To tiGhtEn mY bElt eVen mORe... hAiz....
Am i DoiNg thINgs coRReCtlY oR nOt...

TirE...

哭完了就把眼泪擦掉， 重新戴上笑容， 微笑地度过明天 bEcOs i LeFt wiTh NoThinG
NoThinG At aLL!!!

16 daYs BeForE mY nExT pAydaY... BuT NoW i LeFt wiTh NOTHING AT ALL ExcEpT DeBtS!!
URGH!!!
ShoULd i QuiT mY jOb... bUt By LOoKinG At ThE wAy i'M LiViNg NoW...
iF i qUiT... I'M sO goInG tO DiE i ThiNk...!

ReaLLy HaTe ThE liFe I"m LEaDInG RiGHt nOW
i HaTE mY pAst...
i SeE nO fUtUrE iN mY liVe...
SeRiOuSly hAtE eVerYthiNG...
hOw i wiSh i"m BrAin deAd...
hOw i wisH i'M DeAd...

bUt DeAtH cAn soLvE eVErYthiNG??
nO!
DeAtH meAniNg I'M giVinG uP whAt i"m fiGHtinG fOr...
buT whAt aM i FiGHtiNg FoR...?
aLL tHe reAsONs iS goNe...
BeCoS thE haPPy MeMoRieS tAt waS bUiLt iN mY lIfE...iS iN thE pAst...
[PAST] mEaNiNg... WhEn iT iS gONe...iT iS oVeR... iT wiLL nEvEr hAppEN aGaIn...

aM i DoiNg ThiNgs RiGht...? iF i'M dOInG It RiGHt... WHY IS MY HEART ACHING EVERY TIME WHEN U ARE OUT OF MY SIGHT...?
HaiZ... ArE wE sEriOUsLy OuT Of ToPic To TaLk Le...?
aM i ThiNkiNG tOO mUch oR ThE PreSSuRE iS AlReADy ThErE whEneVEr wE aRe WaLkInG siDe By SiDe bUt nOt tAlkINg To EaCh OthEr?

HoW i WiSh i CaN sTop aSKinG thOse QuesTioNs... CoS thErE iS nO anS To iT...
BUT MY BRAIN JUST CAN'T STOP DOING THAT!!!
i JUst SiMplY hAte MySelF FoR thAt!!! UrGh!!!

i uSeD tO tEll u thAt... In oUr FriEndsHip... TheRe iS nOThiNG caLL "ouT oF toPiC"... bEcoS i kNoW thAt nO maTTer whAt... i"ll TrY mY bEsT tO TaLk aNd chEEr U uP...
ArE wE lOsiNg faiTh In EaCh oThEr...? oR i"m thE oNe whO iS loSinG fAitH iN u...?
wAt hAd i dOnE whICh iS nOt enOuGH fOr u tO gAin Ur trUst iN mE...?
wAt cAn i dO In OrDEr tO hElp u gAin bAck uR cOnFidenCe & coURAgE FoR U tO moVe oN...?
URGH!! I'm ASkiNg QnS aGaiN!!! *slAp mYSelf*
nO No nO...NoT thAT u dOn hAVe thE cOurAge ...
MaYbE u hAvE mOveD oN fRm tHE prEviOuS "chapTer" iN uR liFe...TaT'S whY u aRe UnaBle tO gO baCk likE whAt wE uSed tO bE...
iS mE... wHo cAn'T GeT oVer ThE pRevioUS "chaPTeR" oF my LiFe... =\
bUt i SeRioUSly dOn wAnnA lOSe U... thAt's foR sURe... =\

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HaiZ.. i dOnnO tOdaY iS A lUckY daY FoR Me oR i"M maKinG mYSeLf woRsT...
i cHanGe mY TP tiMEslOt frM 10JaN tO 29NoV... mY DreAM Of oWniNg ThE biKe iS nEaRer...
bUt AfTEr thAt... i FOuND ouT thAt i dON haVe MoNeY To BoOk LeSSon foR pRactiCe...
*baNg*
cOs iT mEaN... RiGHt noW i dON haVE thE mOneY tO BoOk LeSsOn...
i WiLL nOt hAvE thE moNeY foR mY biKe lAr...
thE MoNey SeEm To Be DisAppEaR SuDDenLy....
hATe tHe fEElinG oF BroKe... HatE iT tO thE coRe....(T_T)

ToDay mY fAcE iS stResSeD thROugh oUt thE LunCh tiMe...
i"m sORRy...
BuT thAnKs FoR thE cHocOlaTe... iT wAs a GreAt SurpRiSe foR mE... =]

iS My AttItuDe CaUSiNg u MiSerY?? HoW shOuld I beHAvE Den??
cOntiNuE tO pOkE mY noSe iNtO uR BuSinEsS??
cOnTinUE tO CaLL u DeaR... BuT RecEiVinG UnCoMfoRMaTiON Tat u ArE ReaDy tO bE mY DeaR oR nOT...
sO... iS caLLiNg U dEar HuRtiNG u oR HurTinG mYselF??
i sEriOUSly DoNNo hOw tO bEhaVe...
wHeN i TriEd tO bE clOse tO u... wE alWaYS enDeD uP quArrliNg...
sO i TriEd tO puSh u AwAy... BuT i EnDeD uP nOt GiVinG u ThE BrEAthInG sPAcE thAt u ouGhT tO haVe...
iS evEryThiNg taT i Do... i DoiNG iT coRRectLY??
iS pUshiNg U aWAy A cOrrEcT chOIce??
wiLL i RegREt dOinG iT oNE daY??
aNd YeT... i DoN waN tO loSe u... SeRioUslY...

aM i StrAiGht?? [ha ha... mEn DesToRy My lIfe aLot... i BEgAn tO loSe TruST iN thEm i thinK]
-->i DoNNo<-- bUt i dON wAnnA hUrt u... BuT i DOn WaNNA loSe U BEcoS oF tHiS qnS tOO.. oR i JUst pUreLY dON waNNA LoSe u As a FriEnD wHO oNCe giVe mE thE sEnSe oF SecUriTy?? HaiZ... thEre ArE tiMes i dOn wiSh To hUrt u... bUt YEt... i"m DoiNG thAt... UrgH!!!!! i'M... soRRy... i JuSt wAn U tO bE hAppY...

iT iS 9.32Am... TodaY nO lesSoN anD yEt i'M hiDinG iN oNe Of thE clAssRooM...
why??
BecOs i DoN fEEl lIke goIng HomE....
JusT sIMpLy dON fEel lIke gOinG hoMe...
TiS WeEk.. TodaY... iS thE 3rD dAy i Did nOT Get ANy pOckEt mOneY aLReAdy...
ThiS moNth... i"m SeRiouSly BroKE AlrEadY AnD YEt i sTiLL haVe tO uSe mY oWn mOnEy tO bUY fOOd...
YesTeRdaY i AskeD My MUM fOr MOnEy... ShE sAid ' u Nv caLL uR fAthER foR mONey.. HoW u ExpEct Me To giVe u MonEy??'
i WaLk oUt oF ThE hoUse... AnD yEsTErdaY SpEnt $6 To TaKE cAb To WoRk earliEr shItf...JuST bEcOS i WAnnA enD woRK 30mins EarliEr... AnD ReAcH hoMe Abt 1hR EaRliEr... [iDioT Me]
DeN aT niGht... BecOS iT waS tOo LAte AFtEr i ReAch hoMe anD shOwerEd... sO i sEnt A MsG tO taT FatHEr oF miNe tO reMinD hiM tO giVe POckEt mOnEy...
iN thE mORnINg... AgaIn... i SeE nO poCkEt mONeY... So i ASked My mUm aGaiN...
shE sAid " wAit TiLL uR FAthEr giVe U thE MonEy dEn i pASs iT tO u"
WTF!!!!!
If mY fAthEr 2 WeEks Nv cOmE anD giVe mOneY... MeaN i GoiNg To SuRvivE oN mY oWn FoR 2 WeEks... MeAn i WiLL DIE bY thE 2nD wEeks coS mY moNeY oNli EnoUGh foR 1 WeEK LaR!!!
WTF!!!

PpL SaY "SavE fOR RaiNY dAys"
DiDn't i??
EaCH tiME i sAved thE mOneY... It EnDeD uP pAyiNG fOR thIS... pAyinG foR thAt...
woRkINg mY aSS Off FoR All THeSe sHIt!!!
FiRSt tiMe --> lAptOP
FoLLow By SchOOl Fee... BiKe lEsSon... pAymEnt FoR bIkE...
i stiLL oWe MY mUm $1400 FoR thE FujItSu lAPtoP tAt i BouGHt aT fiRsT...

i SeRioUSlY HaTe tHe FeEliNG oF bEiNG BroKe aNd poOR
coMe frOM a BroKen & pOOr FaMilY siNCe YOuNg...
SeRiouSlY hAte It...
i HatE mY pASt...
i HAtE thE pResEnt Me...

HoW sCArY caN LonEly Be??

i ThiNK...
LoNeLy iS a KinD oF FeEliNG oF ThE oTherS arE leAviNG U...
loNelY iS whEn lOOkiNG aT thE pEopLE suRRouNDinG yOu BUt thEre Is No ONe u CaN leaN onTO...nO oNe To hOLd OntO...
lONeLy LEaD tO eMptiNesS IN Ur HeArT...

whEnEvEr i"m oN mY oWn... LoNeliNesS CreEp IntO mE...
hOw i WiSh u ArE bEsiDe mE...
bUt wiSh anD reAliTy iS aLwaYs OpPOsiTe... thE clOSnesS thAT wE uSed To hAve... iS nOt thErE anYmORe...

i ReAllY fElT liKe giVinG Up... EvERythiNG...
hAd i hOld OntO U foR tOO loNg?? hOldiNg OnTo thE wiSh thAt wE wiLL bE clOSe agAin foR tOO lonG?? aM i Too sTuBBorN tO lEt iT gO??
u SaiD u ArE nOt reAdY tO bE mY deAr AgAin...
hOw lOnG muSt i wAit??
i kNow...DesPitE mE aSkiNg hErE...
eVeN iF i Ask U thEsE qnS aGaiN...
thE anS wiLL stiLL bE tHe sAmE...
u ArE trYinG uR besT tO reGaIn thE TrusT iN mE...
u ArE trYiNg To fiNd oUt Who u Are...
u ArE trYinG tO kNoW whO i'M...
u ARe tRyINg tO RegAin thE clOSeneSS...
buT ThE cloSeneSS Is alReaDy gOnE...
eVeryTHing nEgAtiVe wiLL bE gOinG oN & On... iS LikE a CyCle....
sHouLd i ConTinUE tO hoLd On??
oR iT iS tiMe tO lEt gO??

ha
ha
ha
knOw whAT??
i'M a coWaRd...
bEcoS i DaRe noT tO tHinK beYonD thE qnS thAt i AskEd mYselF...
BeCos i DArE nOt tO FigURe oUt thE aNs ThAT i aSkeD mySelf...
i"m siMplY UseleSS...

WhY?!?!
wHY iS mY liFe RevOlvinG ArouND u!?!
aLL thE whILe In My BloG iS aLL ABouT u... Do u knOw thAt?!?!
oF aLL thE pPl... OnLi U...!!!

whAt thE hEll haVe i BeComInG tO?!?!?!
wOrrYinG thIS WoRRyinG thAt FoR u...
JeAlouS oF thIS JeAloUS oF thAt BeCAuSe oF u...
tHinkIng oF thIS tHInkiNG oF thAt beCaUSe oF u...
U!! u!!! u!!!!
Not SaYinG thAt i'M miSeraBle BEcoS oF u...
buT To SaY ThAt iS hOw iMpoRtaNt u ArE iN mY lifE...
Do U knOw taT?!?!

RiGHt nOw iSsn'T iT bEttEr...?
mE saYinG "MAybe i ShouLd NOt Ask U anYthiNG le"
u SaYinG 'miGht aS weLL kEep quiTe'
whAt a gOOd ComBinAtiOn siA~~

thIS aFTernOOn i TolD u taT i'M afriAd thAt tHe thINkinG oF "i shOUld NOt exiST" miNdsEt iS iN uR brAin... aNd NoW u ArE thINkinG oF iT agAin...
whAt thE heLL aRe u TryIng tO dO?!?!?
whaT thE hEll dO u wAn mE tO do??!?!
i RmB thAt u doN waN mE to HiD anYthING frOM u...
sO i tEll U evEryThiNG... AskeD u OvER evErythiNG...
u GeT piSSed Off bY iT...
u TeLL mE u DoNNo...
whAt fOr u wAn mE tO TeLL u EvErythINg?!?!?!

BoTh oF Us iS AfrAid tO loSe eAch OtHEr...
BotH oF uS iS trYiNG tO taLK to eAch otHEr...
BuT eaCh tiMe We eNdeD uP quArrelinG...
SerIouSly... i"m GeTTing woRRiEd thAt We DoN hAVe tOpiC tO tAlK anYmoRe...
buT i guEsS bOTh Of Us hAd TriEd ouR bESt...

i DoNNo whAT CaN i dO anYmoRe Le... =\
juSt stAy bY uR siDe?
whEn u FaLL... i lEnD u My hanD tO puLL u oN fEEt aGaIn
whEn u TiRed... i LeT u ResT oN mY shOuldEr
iS thAT enOUGh FoR u??
iF thAt iS enOUgH deN i CAn dO iT...
bUt i CAn teLL u thIS...
iF bOtH oF uS keEp quArReliNG...
iF bOTh oF uS doEs nOT haVe CoMMon toPIc tO tAlk Abt...
WaLKinG siDe bY siDe wiLL bEcoME a PreSSuRe BeCoS bOTh oF uS DoNNO whAt We Can tAlk abOUt anYmoRe...
i DoN wiSh tAt to HaPPeN k!!

a feW daYs aGo... i WaTcHeD onE sHOw... cALLed GamEpLAn...
i ThinK i shOulD nOt haVe WAtcHeD tAt sHow At aLL...
i CRiEd OuT oF blUe... WhEn i sAw thE SeNce oF thE fAthEr woRRyiNg abOUt HeR dAughTer...
anD tHe dAughTer MakiNG fUn oF hEr fAthEr...
thE HeArtwaRminG SeNce mAKes Me thINk oF mY fAThEr.. whO HaS DesToRyEd thE FaMily...
HaiX...
i thINk i ForGoT How mY FaThEr LoOKs LiKE lE... Hee...
TOo buSy In My LiFe... HArDly At hOmE...
eVErytiME i oNLi sAW thE moNeY thAt hE pUt whEnevNEr hE RetuRn hOmE...
i Can'T rMb whEn iS thE lAst tiME i SaW hIm... =X
i ThiNK hE hAs AgEd aloT lE bAh~ doNNo... serVe hiM riGht...

NothInG muCh tO SaY...
BeCoS i dOn feEl liKe saYinG...
mAybE thErE iS reAllY NothiNg mUcH tO saY... =\

ReAllY felT liKe GiviNG Up... eVerYthINg...
thEre WaS onCe... She iS noT thErE...
I tOT whEn sHe iS noT thErE... U wiLL tAlk To mE moRe...
BuT iN thE EnD... i oNli FeLT tHAt thE BaRRiEr iS sTilL thErE...
tOdaY wEnT To ViVo... Me wHole Day.. TrYinG To gEt clOsE tO u...
BuT All i SeE iS U VeRY cloSe To HeR... DeN mE clOSe tO miNNie...
i TriEd To hoLd Ur ArM... trY tO waLk bEsiDe U... caN u SeE thaT?
iT lOOks LikE... yeA... NothiNG muCh tO saY Le...
LatEr oN aT niTe.. i stArtEd tO waLK slOweR... i sTarTed tO sloW doWn... mAyBe dUe tO mY hEaDAchE... i NoT suRe...
aGAin... i TriEd tO hOld uR aRm... sAYinG thAT u puLL mE waLk... dEn i sAw u pUllEd wEn xuaN's aRm... sO i LeT gO oF uR aRm ImMediAtEly...

mAybE i'M sElfisH... coS i ReaLLy doN waN tO loSe U...
mAYbE i'm ChilDiSh... cOs i JeAlouS eAsiLy...
mAYbE i"m FooLiSh... coS u kEEp teLLinG mE NOt To taKe hEr anD coMpaRe wiTh mySelf...
BuT i cAn'T fiNd thE SenSe oF sEcURe fRm u.... =\
tAt whY i kEEp AskiNG u thOSe qnS... bUt u cAn'T anS mE...
sO whEn u aSKed mE whAt'S thE maTTer witH me...
i dOnnO hOw tO TeLL u tAt ...i jUSt CaN't FinD thE SenSe oF sEcuRE frOm u... =\

LeT iT Go.. i hAvE tO teLL mySelF... whEn i ReCEivE nO anS...
whEn u ArE haPPy... i"m coNTenD... i hAvE tO teLL mySelf tAt...
i dON liKe tO sEE u sAd...

stArtiNG oF 1 WeeK sChoOl hOliDAy...
buT eArlY moRniNG wenT tO sCh foR arCherY trAiniNg...
qUitE fUn... cOs i mAnGed tO tAhaN thE trAinInG All ThE wAy....
DiD 6 kuNcKle PusH-Up bEfORe i ShooT eAch enD... Got Do abOUt 80+ baH...
skIn aBiT soRe As i DId thE pUSh-uP oN RoaD...
yEaP, thOSe roAd thAt CaR diRvE oN... =X
i GuEsS i"m AlwaY puShiNG mY liMiT aLL thE tiMe...

DeN aFtEr thE trAiNInG...
wEnT tO yiShuN tO eaT...
wE AtE tHe chIckeN riCe oVer thErE...
miNNie bEcoMe a HunGry GhoSt!!!
ShE aTe chIckEn riCe nOt EnouGh... WeNT tO orDer HoKKieN mEE SomEmORe...
AlthOUghT i AdmiT thAt thE chIckEn riCe iS kiNDa SmaLL poRtiOn...
aFtEr eAtiNg thE chiCkeN riCe... i BouGht CarrOt caKe To ShaRe WitH YahUi anD MaX
thE fUNnY paRt iS taT tHe $4 CarrOT CakE loOk liKe $6 POrtiON wHilE tHe $3 chickeN RicE lOOk LiKe $2 oNLi... LolX
BuT sHe aFTer EatiNg thE hoKKieN MeE, HelP To eaT FriEd CArrOt cAke...
OMG!! ShE SUrE kNOw hOw tO eAt lAh~~

AfTer eAtinG... sHop NOrthPoiNT aWhilE...
wEnT To StaRbuCk To eAt aGaiN...[TirAmiSu] =P
StarTeD tO fEEl stOmAchAchE... >.<
OmG... doNNo How FaT anD pOOr i'M goINg tO bE iF toDay's EvEnT coNtinUe...
WEnt To yiShuN pArK tO wAstE tiMe ovEr thErE...
DeN We plAy "A", "B", "C", "D".
LosEr iS whEn fOllOwiNg thE cAllEr's CAll oF A, B, C oR D
i Tio smACk thE moSt lAH~ [faiNT]
HAnD bErY pAin FrOm thE KnuCkle PusH-Up AnD smAckiNg frM thE gaME... (T_T)
DeN gO hoME afTEr thAT... pHeWs...

haiX...
JusT gOt mY pAY --> $380... bUt Pay mY biKe--> $250... DeN i LeFt wiTh $130
HoW tO suRvIve fOR oNe mTh??
GoiNg To sTop woRkinG in NiGHt SaFaRi sOOn...
iF cONtiNue tO teAch TuTioN... eAch mTh onLi eArN AbT $370...
wAlaU... deN thIS aFTernOOn ReCeiVe A caLL saYinG anOthEr faMily WaN Me tO teAch thEiR kiDs...
GoT JOb iS nIcE lAh~i CaN EaRn MoRe~
BuT whErE dO i fiNd thE tIMe
- To teACh tuTioN...
- To hAVe ArcHEry trAinInG
- To hAVe timE foR FYP nExt YeaR...
- tO havE tiME fOr My fRieNd

i pUnChEd thE wAll... tO vEnt oUt All thEsE stReSS...
bUt u Nv AskEd mE abT whAt...
kiNd oF uNliKe U... bUt... yeA... ArE u gOinG tO stOP CaRing mE?? =\

TO clEaR mY miNd...
To wASte tiME tOO =X

likE whAt mY fRieNd saId... ASkinG u qnS tAt u doEs nOt hAVe AnS... kEep AskinG oSo nO uSe.... i'M juST aDDinG pResSuRe tO u oNli...

Let U bE wHO u ArE... GiVe u thE bReaThiNG spAcE tAt u NeeD... whEn u ArE ReaDy tO anS mE ... u wiLL... aNd We will bE cloSe aGaiN =]
bUt dOn lEt mE wAit tOO loNg k... =\

SembAwANg ParK thEre goT niCe niCe cloUd thE moMenT i ReACheD tHerE... Heee
iT clAm mE doWN alOt...
mAybE i hAvE thInk tOO mUch... HenCE caUsinG u tO bE So miSerY...
i"m sOrrY... i Will StOp dOinG anYthINg tAt maKe U saD... cAn'T proMiSe bUt i"ll TrY mY beST...
Me mYsElF sAd caN... BuT u SaD caNNot... yuP =]
liKe whAt i ProMisEd u
--> To tAke cAre Of U Till thE daY i caN't dO thAT anYmoRE <--

HmmM... hAve tO gRoW uP moRE... StiLL nOT MAtuRe enOuGH AnD thAT iS whY ANyhoW thINk... groW uP wiNNie... GroW Up...! =]

iF i WeRE tO suRviVe foR anOthEr 24 hRs oNli... whAt wiLL u dO??
If i weRe tO leaVe U... wiLL U foLLoW mE??
iF i wErE tO sToP loOkiNg AftER u... Will u tRy tO cAtCh mY atteNtiOn aGaIn??

HoW muCh tiME dO We nEEd FOr EAch oTHer??
hOw LoNg CaN We stAy bEsiDe eACh oTHer??
hOw mUcH loNgEr cAn i TahAn aLL thESe thINkiNG?

whAT hAvE i dONe whiCh mAKes u ThiNk thAT i'M imPOrtAnt In Ur liFe??
whY iMpoRtAnt??
iS thE quArrEliNG yeSteRdaY mAKes uS unDerstANd eACh othER mOrE??
Am i ASkINg Too muCh frOm U??
cAn u AnS Me tO coNfirM whErE ArE wE eXaCtly??

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i WaS woNDerIng...
iF i DecidED tO shOw u mY blOg...
wiLL u Be AngrY FoR mE hiDinG mY bLOg FrM u fOr sO loNG??
whAT wiLL hAPpeN aFtEr i DeCideD tO shOw U thiS bloG oF MinE??
wiLL i Be aDDinG mOre stRess To U??
Will u UndeRstAnD mE mOrE??
[[ i doNNo ]]

i'M staRinG aT thE sCreEn dOnnO whAT tO tpYe iNto TodaY'S bloG
FeeLinG sO mEsSy

riGht NOw... I'm tRyinG tO puSh u AwaY frOM mY lifE...
beCoS i cOulD noT bRinG u lAugHtEr liKe thE oThEr dO...
miLLioN oF unWaNtiNG... bUt i hAvE nO chOiCe

BotH Of uS iS sO cOnfuSeD... i KnOw thAt...
CloSe fRienD... NeW friEnDs... wHO tO cHooSe??


tOdaY quArrel dO huRt eaCH othER alOt i ThiNk...
i"m sOrrY... sHOwiNG u AttiTudE... iS mY faUlt...
miLLioN oF unWanTed tO sEe u sAd...
BuT yEt sO unWanTed tO tAkE a sTeP bACk aNd chEEr u Up...
wiLL i Be JeAlouS whEn i See u clOSe tO othER??
-->yeS i Will<--
bUt i Can'T dO anYtHinG beCos It iS uR FrEEdOM tO chOOSe whO u WAnnA cloSe tO...

buT i alWaYs quEstiOninG mYselF...
whY?!?!
wHy Do i LeT u cONtrOl mY liFe wiLLinGly sO mUch?!?!
whY i CaN dON bOthEr tHe oTherS sO muCh bUt nOT u!??!
HoW cAn i sToP aLL thEsE thInG?!!?!
iS it PoSSibLe tO sTop iT?!?!


BuT i DoN wisH tO sTop iT... i DonNo wHy...
MAyBe No OnE haS cAre sO mUch FoR mE beForE...
mAybE iS beCoS oF thE proMiSe i mAde For U...
mAybE................................................... i DoN wiSh tAt wiLL hAppEN agAin...=\